This is an article from AJ Walton of Cracking the Happiness Code
Over the last 2.5 years, I have seen more doctors, physiotherapists, massage therapists, specialists of every type, and done more tests than I could care to remember. None of it had helped me get my voice back.
I was out of ideas and insanely frustrated. So frustrated that one day, I locked myself in the bathroom and vowed not to come out until I had found a solution.
When it came, it was not at all in the form I expected.
We have 2 options when it comes to changing our lives: Change what we do, and change how we think about what we do. I’d exhausted the former…and myself in the process. It was time to take a different approach and change my mind.
How to Run Our Minds
If we were to gather up all the happy people in the world and compare them to everyone else, we would see that one of the main differences between the groups is the way they each talk to themselves.
And by deliberately shaping this dialogue, we are able to alter the quality of our experience – for better or worse.
Of all the things we can tell ourselves, all the affirmations and mantras, there are 3 phrases which have a particularly powerful, positive effect on our minds – 3 that helped me get my life back. Here they are, the 3 simple phrases that will change your life:
#1: I Am Here
One of the biggest causes of unhappiness is the desire to be anywhere except where we are now. We may want more money, achievement, better health or relationships, and making any of these things conditions for our happiness is a losing battle.
Happiness can only be found where we are now. It’s one thing to pursue a desire and another to base our happiness on its fulfillment, and it’s this running toward pleasure and away from pain that actively prevents us from engaging with the present and finding peace where we are.
The phrase “I am here” helps ground us fully in the present, and helps us accept our circumstances without judgment.
Ironically, this place of stability is the only place from which we can pursue our goals and dreams without sacrificing our happiness in the process, as we’re acting from a place where fulfillment and contentment already exist.
#2: I Love You
Far too often in life our interactions with others are a source of discomfort, dissatisfaction, and stress. Instead of creating deep connections, we end up erecting barriers between ourselves and others.
By approaching everyone with the attitude of unconditional love and compassion we can dissolve these barriers and create the circumstances for meaningful connections to form. This is particularly important when we’re dealing with people who are dealing with their own suffering and are acting out of anger, frustration, or fear.
Furthermore, when we treat everyone with love, we become immune to any psychological harm they may aim at us, as the love we are showing the world extends to our own person. We become safe and secure as a result – the only true forms of safety and security we can ever have.
#3 – Life is Easy!
Past failures, unmet expectations, and negative experiences with authority figures as we’re growing up can give us the impression that life is difficult.
This perspective not only colors our experience with the underlying impression that life is a strenuous, trying thing, but it stops us from being adventurous, creative, and taking calculated risks.
However, when we cultivate the sense that life is easy, we’ll find that it becomes easy!
Not only do we life a psychological weight off our shoulders, but by freeing ourselves to dream big and take some intelligent risks toward the achievement of our goals, we’ll find ourselves living with a lot more passion and creating many more positive results in our lives.
The big roadblocks that have stopped our progress in the past will seem much smaller, much more manageable, and we’ll keep our mind open – and in problem-solving mode – by feeling like life is easy and success is inevitable than if we feel like things are impossible, beyond our abilities, or that we have no control over the outcome.
These 3 phrases have the power to be catalysts for great positive change by transforming the way we see the world and interpret events. By making them a part of our daily dialogue, we will find ourselves waking up happier individuals in the weeks and months to come. So give them a try, and leave any questions or comments you may have in the comments below!
Author Bio: AJ Walton sold all his stuff to travel the world in an effort to better understand the human animal and what makes us tick. Now he helps people escape The Hedonist Treadmill and live passionate, creative, fulling lives at Cracking The Happiness Code.
Great article, and all three are very powerful, especially the first two.
From a spiritual standpoint, the present moment contains all the power anyway, and by default, has the highest chance of de-stressing you, giving you mental clarity, and of course, intuition.
The second, unconditional love, is kinda the oil that makes the whole universe go, and also helps dissolve fear based situations (as well as helping the law of attraction process;-).
And the third can be taken as an affirmation…and we all know how powerful they can be!
Thanks for a good post
“I am responsible for everything that happens in my life” is another phrase that has impacted me a lot. It gives me the notion that I can change my life since I am in control of it and not somebody else.
Have a great day!
Love this post! Yes to all three affirmations.
#1 is key – I am Here – so often we time travel to future plans or worries or back to past grievances or regrets and miss the life going on right in front of us.
But #3 is great – Life is Easy. Just this morning I was telling myself how I can do something I’ve been putting off for a while, I just need to let the energy flow to doing it with ease and speed – and I’ve already achieved more in two hours than in the previous two days. I’m already a big fan of affirmations and this one is going on my daily list. Thank you from Kathryn of Brilliant Living HQ
Thanks for sharing your experiences Kathryn! Isn’t it amazing how a simple mind shift can help us get more done in hours than we were in days?
I find myself forgetting #3 the most. I’m trying to learn Russian right now, and when I have this attitude, everything goes great, when I forget – nothing seems to work!
That first one is so key. I was unhappy for so many years because I wasn’t living someone else’s life, or I haven’t achieved a certain level of success yet, or some other comparison. All that does is breed unhappiness. To embrace the present and focus your energy on it is so essential to happiness. It is also essential to being productive because if you are constantly comparing yourself or daydreaming then you are wasting valuable energy that could be used to make a difference in your life now.
Thanks for the feedback Sebastian.
I agree completely with the comparison point – I’ve been in the same boat. It doesn’t work and it doesn’t matter what others are doing!